Here's to the new year......

It's been quite awhile since I've written on here. I wish I had time and felt up to doing it all on a regular basis but I don't. 2014 was rough to say the least. Even though I coaches water polo and swim season, my car situation made starting a new team impossible. Plus I had both lawsuit cases going and my health declining. Coming home from swim practice last spring in the rain, a lady hit me from behind going 80 and totalled my car. Both dogs were in the back seat asleep. Redley got up as we were spinning into the center area and started shaking and crying. Teeny hid on the floor in the back seat. Luckily, there was all my surf stuff in the trunk of the car which helped absorb the impact to the backseat and therefore the dogs. Since then, Redley has shown signs of having PTSD. While it may sound stupid, it's not. He is now very scared to go for a car ride. So even though he desperatley wants to go with me to the beach or to work, at the same time he freaks out in the car. He tries so hard not to panic but he does. Panting, shaking, crying, nudging me, etc. Not good when you drive a stick shift. The good news is that I don't think it's so bad that he will never bounce back, but it's gonna take a long time. Biggest issue is that I haven't had a reliable vehicle since the accident.

So I received no money or rental car from the accident until July. The accident was April 1st.  The other party was 100% at fault and I got a lawyer and it still took 3 or 4 months to get a dime. Problem was that it meant I had no transportation to get to work which meant no income which meant no vehicle. I took what little they gave me and had to pay off some bills that were past due and put the rest into trying to get my truck running again. At least with the truck, I know how reliable it is. There was no way I had enough money to get any other vehicle that would run well for that cheap. But the truck hadn't run in almost 2 years. I had originally planned on fixing it and selling it down the road but it's hard on my body to drive which is why my dad had given my the car. Driving stick was killing my back, especially since my slave cylinder leaks and so sometimes the clutch goes out. So the dogs weren't even in a car for the better part of 3 months. From there, it has taken a ton of time to get the truck going. I owed my mechanic $600 for fixing the truck a 2 years earlier so I had to pay that off. Luckily, he knew what was happening and helped me anyway. Then, the truck wouldn't even start and all the hoses were cracked and wouldn't pass smog. Mom and I tag teamed with her car for the entire water polo season in the fall. It was crazy and ridiculous and time consuming and hard on both of us. My other lawsuit was finally settled in October which gave me enough to finally get the truck going but it's been on and off again and now it's February. I still need a new tire and for it to pass smog.

What does all this have to do with the dogs? Well, for awhile they were riding with me short distances every day. I found that that helped Redley not to go far. I also found that if I can get him to poop before we leave then he does better. Once we get to stop number 1 and I can walk him a bit and go potty, he settles down. Usually by the time we head back, he's much better. But with the crazy car schedule and problems, i have not had a chance to really work with him daily on it. Almost 3 weeks ago, the slave cylinder completely blew up and I've been without a vehicle again and started work this week. To replace it and the clutch is around $1000 if you're lucky. Usually it's more like $1500. I must have good karma on my side and mine did it for $750 which made it so I could get a rental car for work this week while he fixed it. Which he did in 3 days. Totally amazing. My mechanic is such an awesome guy. He said the slave cylinder had been leaking pretty badly for longer than we thought. There was like a whole cup of fluid in there just sitting which is really bad. We knew in 2011 it was leaking so it's been that way for probably 5 years!!!

Anyway, since before the accident money has been super tight. Once the accident happened it was even worse. I couldn't start my new business and I couldn't make extra money on the side like normal. I usually do swim and surf lessons on the side for extra cash. Can't do that without a car. Unemployment only pays a portion and it's certainly not enough to get a car AND pay bills. Going to the vet? pretty much impossible. Plus, had covered california not happened, I would probably be homeless because my medicine would be impossible to pay for. Redley has 2 bad knees, car anxiety, and a spot on his eye that wasn't there until this last year. My thought was something hit him in the eye during the accident. But I can't prove it. It's gotten a little bigger recently which worries me, and although it doesn't seem to bother him at all, I would like to get it checked ASAP. Obviously it's possible that it's a tumor but I don't think so and I REALLY REALLY hope not. But again, no way do I have the money for that. I haven't even paid off the work on the truck and I stil need to get a new tire and get it to pass smog like, YESTERDAY!!

Mom was telling me there are groups that will help pay vet bills for people who want to take care of their pets and do the right thing. My family has been through so much with animals it's kind of insane. Our friends always say they want to be a pet in our family because they have the best lives. Makes me feel good to hear that yet we always seem to go through some of the most awful hardships too. I'm hoping I can figure out how to get life back on track and get Redley and Teeny's health back right along with it. Teeny recently had a huge abcess in his mouth that we went through 2 rounds of antibiotics with and found that he has a high protein count in his kidneys so had to put him on meds for that. If he doesn't get a lower protein count after a month then we can't do dental surgery to fix his teeth and will have to work on it with other measures. The vet said he will be fine either way though. Thank goodness.

Oh, did I mention we have a family of skunks living under the house?

Irresponsible owners....GO SUCK IT!!

Just a rant....I have several rescue groups on my Facebook page that ask for help in rescues that are literally a life and death situation. I just saw one this morning of the skinniest pitbull I have ever seen! Not much else wrong with her except that. ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS FEED THE POOR GIRL!!!! AND they will pretty much eat whatever you give them. Especially when they are LITERALLY starving! I have a close friend who just lost her best friend of 8 years to cancer after spending thousands on chemotherapy.  I have another friend whose dog just finished recoveri g from TPLO knee surgery only to find cancer in her lymph nodes. Again spending thousands on chemotherapy!  These people wojld do anything to save them and you wont even feed them? WTF is wrong with you?! Then I get a message this morning from a family who wants to get rid of their dog because they leave it in the backyard 24/7 and the dog "barks." Of course the dog barks! Its got nothing else to do! How about take it for a walk, train it, love and care for it? Show some responsibility and compassion! Sorry, pretty pissed off at the whole situation.

Soooo sooo very much has happened

Wow. Dont know when I last wrote in here. So where are we now? In the past 2 years  I lost Jack to Cancer at 13 years old. I lost Bugs to kidney disease at almost 17 years old. Mom lost Napoleon to a rare illness (I will post the name when I remember it). Poor Teeny went through a horrific depression after Jack died. He wouldnt eat, or walk or anything. He has just turned the corner to good health in the last 6 months. I adopted Redley (red nosed pitbull mix) to help Teeny....which he did! He is a happy and funny boy! My heart aches every day though for the loss of Jack and Bugs. I was warned by a friend that it never goes away and so far thst is true. The piece of me that was soley for them cannot be fixed, repaired, or replaced. When it is Redley or Teenys time to go I will lose the piece of me that they each have. I wonder if we pass away when all of our pieces are gone. That we have loved all that we can. The heartache is just brutal.
Mom adopted Chloe (a french bulldog) after realizing that the sudden loss of Napoleon at 4 years old wasnt going away. Chloe was born the day after Napoleon died. We met her 4 weeks later and took her home 4 weeks after that. She is a happy and cuddly and energetic little girl! She loves her Redley and Redley loves her!
Our lives have been full of bumps and bruises and triumphs and challenges. I'll post more about all we have been through soon!

Feeling a little blue.

I'm not sure why today in particular, but I'm missing Jack and Bugs a lot. I think some of it is because I'm really pushing Carol to help me figure out a way for Sunshine to be able to start coming inside or at least give him a warm, safe and dry place to go.
We've been feeding him for about 6-8 months now and he definitely calls our home, home. He knocks on the door if we are late feeding him. We are the only ones allowed to pet him. He's not afraid of Redley at all.
I can't help it. Here's a cat who trusts only us. He was on deaths door and chose us. And I understand that Carol is worried about him wrecking stuff or.giving the nous a disease or something but there are plenty of ways around them. I've come up with several.simple.solutions and she still says no. So today I was like "what the hell is your problem? Why won't you let him come in the house or at least help him stay warm and dry?" I got no response. When I got home tonight she said we would.discuss it but we didn't. I'm gonna try again tomorrow. It's supposed to rain again next week and I would feel better if I knew he would be safe, warm, and dry.
Today and yesterday were our first rain storms of the season. I tried to see if she would let him stay in the garage but she said no. I know Bugs and Jack sent him to us cuz they knew we would help. I feel like we are doing them a disservice by not making him part of the family.
I love you and miss you both every day of my life.
XOXO,
your momma.

return of the mango pit

After being up til 1am listening to Redley's tummy grumble and gurgle, I finally fell asleep. I had nightmares a few times but then woke up with him still breathing and curled up with me. At 6am, I woke up to go to the bathroom and because I heard him licking his feet. It must be a weird dog thing because Jack used to do that when he didn't feel good either. Next thing I know....up comes the mango pit. Based on size, I'm gonna say the whole thing came up which makes me happy. He did however break it into parts before swallowing which is good to know. I don't know that it would've gone down or up if he hadn't. I think I took how sturdy Jack's stomach was and how much he was able to pass through because of how big he was. Redley is almost 30 pounds lighter than Jack even though over all, size wise, they are about the same. Redley has long legs where Jack was a super muscled pit bull with almost twice the size. Their bodies are/were very different. Anyway, it's out and he seems no worse for wear. He has eaten, played and drank water as normal regardless. I also read this strange article about how to get a mango pit out. I don't know that I would recommend it unless you talk to a vet first but we did the pumpkin part of it to try to get things moving. I attached the link below. Let me know if anyone has first hand experience with this. It would be great for others to know!

http://peterdobias.com/2010/07/foreign_body_surgery/

What a relief!

One of those "worst mom ever" moments

Like it wasn't bad enough that Jack swallowed a fish hook when he was five and cost me five grand to fix (good thing my friends and family loved him because I had to borrow and pay it back over a long time), but now Redley went and swallowed a mango pit after I've only had him for two weeks. I put the pit in the garbage can and as I did, somewhere in my mind I said, "I should probably take the garbage out cuz it's kinda full and I don't want him to be tempted." But like an idiot, I didn't do it right that second. I decided it would be okay until I finished my lunch. I hadn't even sat down, all I did was walk into the other room to put my plate down and it was too late. Shit.

He's a big dog and he can pop a tennis ball in about five seconds so I'm hoping he at least broke it into a few parts before swallowing.  I can only hope. He pooped once since then, but obviously the concern is that he won't pass it on his own. He hasn't gone poop that we know of today but he did go out by himself several times so there's no way to be sure. I'm hoping we will have good news by tomorrow. I could just cry. I still hurt every day because I miss Jack so much. I can't take losing another any time soon, and Redley deserves better than me.

Unbelievable. Not sure I can sleep because of guilt, and because I'm so worried and upset. I'm such a dumbass....guess I'm in the dog house now.

Wow, life changes so fast!

I haven't even finished going through all the emotions of losing Jack, or even finished writing it down. And here I am about to tell you about the newest member of our family....Redley! Teeny, our chihuahua has been very sick the last few months. After losing Jack to cancer, Teeny lost himself. Prior to Jack's influence in his life, he kind of didn't do much. Wouldn't go for walks, fussed about what he ate if anything. He just was kind of there. Which at the time was probably good since Carol (my partner) was still going through some rough spots with her divorce. He would curl up with her in bed and just keep her company during the day while the kids were at school. When we met, I laughed because I would get to the beach with Jack, and Teeny would just be standing there, off leash, looking at Carol like, "What am I supposed to do now?" Anyway, long story short, he quickly learned to follow and outrun Jack to the ball and then follow him back once he picked it up.....since a regular size tennis ball won't fit in Teeny's mouth. Lol.
It's been just about six months since Jack passed away. Teeny started having really bad dreams (and so did I) almost immediately, and they didn't stop until about a month ago. 3 months ago though, he started refusing to eat or walk at all. The only time he would was with Napoleon (my mom's french bulldog) who was a part of the pack with Jack. Since Napoleon isn't here all the time, it wasn't helping much. We finally had to take him to the vet when it got so bad that he couldn't even make it outside before having diarrhea. It was awful. Poor little guy.
So for 3 months now, Teeny has been on steroids, anti-biotics, and stomach medicine. We think he had some food allergies before hand (hence the pickiness before Jack was around). Losing Jack just amplified it greatly. We were told he would probably need them long term. So that solved the food issue.....but he still refused to walk or run any more and he started losing muscle and couldn't even get on the couch without help. It was time to make a tough decision.....
I'm still not anywhere near over losing Jack. I'm not sure I ever will be. I loved him so much and still do. It's so hard. But I care very much about Teeny and it was making it worse for me to see him suffer. I figured looking for a dog didn't mean I would find one. But you know damn well I did.
  I won't go into details because I will probably write them later. It was the perfect situation for everyone. Redley is a pit, boxer, retriever mix. He's a little over a year and a joy to be around. He's handsome and smart and best of all......Teeny loves him :) Bug's is really, really mad at me but I think they will learn to be okay with each other just like he and Jack did, but it's gonna take some time.
In the mean time, Teeny is doing great. And so are we :) More soon!